IELTS Band 8 essay, matter: Extra folks transfer away from their mates and households for work (benefits/disadvantages)


IELTS Model Essay Sample Band 8 September 2024

This essay matter was seen in a current IELTS check in India.

These days, extra folks transfer away from their mates and households for work. Does this improvement have extra benefits or disadvantages?

Pattern Band 8 Essay

In recent times, an rising variety of folks have chosen to relocate away from their mates and households for employment alternatives. Pushed by globalisation and the pursuit of profession development, the choice to maneuver away has a excessive potential for skilled development, a profit that always comes on the expense of household ties. I imagine that on stability, the benefits of such a transfer outweigh the disadvantages.

One of many main sights of relocating for work is the potential for profession development. Main cities in a single’s personal nation and overseas typically provide a wealth of job alternatives, higher salaries, and an opportunity to work with main corporations. For instance, a software program engineer shifting from a small city to a tech hub like Silicon Valley may acquire entry to cutting-edge tasks and substantial profession development. This enhanced skilled panorama can result in larger job satisfaction and long-term monetary stability. One other optimistic side of residing in a brand new metropolis or nation is the publicity to various cultures, concepts, and life, selling private development and flexibility. Transferring away can domesticate a way of independence and resilience, as being in a brand new surroundings challenges people to turn into extra self-reliant and resourceful.

Nonetheless, such relocations are prone to trigger a pressure on private relationships, as bodily distance makes it troublesome to take care of shut ties with household and mates. This separation can lead to emotions of loneliness and homesickness, affecting one’s psychological well-being. For instance, an expatriate residing removed from house may miss essential household occasions, resulting in a way of isolation and disconnection. The absence of an area help community can exacerbate emotions of stress and nervousness, notably in instances of private or skilled disaster.

In conclusion, whereas shifting away from family and friends for work entails some sacrifices, notably in sustaining private relationships, I discover the benefits associated to profession development, private development, and independence extra compelling.

Instructor’s remark:

This can be a good instance of a Band 8 essay.

Job Response: Band 8

Your essay successfully addresses the duty immediate by discussing each the benefits and drawbacks of relocating for work. It presents a transparent introduction, discusses the benefits in a single paragraph and the disadvantages within the subsequent, and concludes with a balanced viewpoint. Your private opinion is clearly said and well-supported all through the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8

The construction of your essay is evident, utilizing paragraphs appropriately for the introduction, benefits, disadvantages, and conclusion. Inside paragraphs, concepts are logically developed, and acceptable linking phrases and phrases are used to attach sentences and concepts. This helps create a clean move of data all through the essay, making it simple to observe.

Lexical Useful resource: Band 8

You’ve demonstrated a robust vary of vocabulary. There have been no vital points with phrase selection or repetition. Effectively accomplished for utilizing phrases similar to:
“relocate” – to explain the act of shifting to a brand new place for work
“globalization” – to debate the broader context of why folks transfer for work
“self-reliant” and “resourceful” – to spotlight the private development side
“exacerbate” – to explain the intensifying of emotions of stress and nervousness

Grammatical Vary and Accuracy: Band 8

General, the essay reveals sturdy grammatical management. Quite a lot of sentence buildings is used successfully. There are solely minor grammatical errors, similar to slight article or preposition misuse – for instance, guaranteeing right article utilization similar to “the improved skilled panorama” quite than “this enhanced skilled panorama.” This doesn’t detract from the general readability and readability of the essay.

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